


The Nerds Live Among Nobility

by MrAquaticKitty



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Astrology, Cats, Chinese Mythology & Folklore, Fluff, God theyre nerds, I am a nerd, Lots of Cats, M/M, No Spoilers, Not beta, Post-Golden Deer Route (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Probably ooc, dumb fluff, dumb gay nerds, linhardt is a nerd, so fucking nerdy, space, they live in a castle, this is nerdy and self indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-12-17 17:21:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21058136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrAquaticKitty/pseuds/MrAquaticKitty
Summary: "Linhardt, we are not going to the moon."





	The Nerds Live Among Nobility

**Author's Note:**

> This is just pure self indulgent nerdy nonsense. Enjoy lmao.

"Have you heard of the legend of the moon rabbit?"

Byleth looked up from his book. The two were peacefully enjoying tea in the comforts of the castle's greenhouse. The two enjoyed gardening greatly and spent many afternoons together in silence within the greenhouse as the occasional maid or butler came by to serve them tea and biscuits.

"I don't believe I have." Byleth answered, taking a sip of tea. Linhardt's eyes sparkled in the special way they do when he's about to lecture Byleth on random things he's read. "Well," Linhardt sat up confidently, tucking a stray strand of green hair behind his ear as he spoke. "The story goes as follows; A woman named Chang E working in the Jade Emperor's palace in heaven accidentally broke an important porcelain jar and angered the Jade Emperor." His blue eyes glowed with passion as he spoke. Usually, Linhardt got bored while explaining legends to people, but when it came to Byleth, he would have a certain excited sparkle in his eyes as he went on. Goddess, he's cute, Byleth thought.

"Afterwards she was banished to earth to live alongside the mortals until she contributed something to society. She became friends with a hunter named Hou Yi. I think they eventually married, I don't know. Anyways," The green nerd spoke as one of the many, many cats Byleth and Linhardt released into the castle jumped on the table and rubbed against his hand. ("Should we get a cat?" "Sure." "How many?" "As many as you want, Lin.")

"For some reason, ten suns arose in the sky, scorching the earth. Being a talented archer, Hou Yi shot down nine of the suns and became king. Although," Linhardt thought for a moment, petting the cat that demanded his attention. "I know the legend doesn't say this, but he must've used a legendary bow. As far as I know, not even Frailnaught has the ability to shoot away the sun out of all things. What do you think, Byleth?" He asked as another cat climbed him.

"It is just a story is it not?" Byleth had set down his book, listening intently to his husband recall the legend. Another cat jumped up on the table. This time, the cat climbed Byleth instead of Linhardt. "But if we assume the story was real, then yes, I do believe it would have to be a legendary bow unlike anything we've seen before. Being a skilled archer isn't enough to be able to do such a thing."

"That's what I thought!" Linhardt agreed, yet another cat climbing him, with a total of three cats on Linhardt and one on Byleth. "There is clearly more about Hou Yi than what meets the eye."

Byleth nodded, another cat climbing Linhardt.

"Anyways, where was I? Oh right." Linhardt had a habit of getting off track when he was relying information of any kind. "Hou Yi became a despot afterward and, oh, he did marry Chang E didn't he? So the two were married and she was queen or something and Hou Yi became a despot. He demanded an elixir of immortality be made to make him immortal, obviously. The elixir was almost completed when Chang E came upon it. Whether she consumed it purposely or on accident was unclear, though it would be strange to accidentally consume an elixir of immortality." He was about to start a conversation about immortality but shut his eyes and briefly shook his head, trying not to get off track again. Another cat climbed Linhardt. It was a miracle that the cats weren't distracting him.

A maid came in, completely unfazed by the sight of Linhardt with almost half a dozen cats on him. She wordlessly served the nerdy couple another round of tea and biscuits. Byleth thanked her silently and Linhardt sneezed, scaring the cats. The cats immediately scattered into the bushes and meowed in fear. Byleth chuckled at the sight. "Are the cats disturbing you, King Linhardt?" The maid asked. Linhardt shook his head. "The cats rarely bother me." He answered, drinking the tea he almost forgot existed. The maid nodded and bowed before leaving. Another cat returned and curled up in Linhardt's lap.

"So as I was saying, Chang E drank the immortality elixir and Hou Yi got mad and went after her. In an attempt to flee, she jumped out of the window. Instead of falling, she floated into the sky and towards the moon. Hou Yi tried to shoot her down but was unsuccessful. Once she arrived on the moon, Chang E became a three-legged toad as punishment from the Queen Mother. A rabbit who became her companion is constantly pounding the elixir of immortality in a mortar. And that is why, if you look up at the moon, you can see the outline of a rabbit. There's many variations of it of course, that is just one of them." Linhardt finished. "I thought you might've enjoyed that story. Actually, I knew you would've enjoyed it." He smugly said.

Byleth smiled fondly. While he did enjoy the story, what he enjoyed most was hearing his husband tell it with such confidence and passion.

"So," Linhardt leaned back in his chair. Byleth gave him a weary look. When Linhardt did that, it meant he had an idea.

"Lin..." Byleth warned. "I haven't said anything yet." Linhardt pouted slightly. "I was just suggesting we try to find evidence of whether or not the legend is true."

"Linhardt, we are not going to the moon."

"Why not?" Linhardt leaned forward, a cat climbing on his back. "Aren't you curious if it's even possible to go there?" He said, as if his idea wasn't ridiculous.

"I do not believe we would be able to survive in space." Byleth sighed. "Nor do I think we have any good way of getting there."

"I can use Warp." Linhardt smirked. "Can you even warp into the sky?" Byleth frowned. "Well, technically I could if I find a surface. My magic range is outstanding, so it wouldn't take that many uses to go into the sky."

"Linhardt...no." Byleth shook his head. "We're kings you know, we can't just leave and go to the moon."

"But imagine if we did. The people would be able to find a new ruler, I'm sure of it. Imagine the two of us, on the moon, searching for the moon rabbit and Chang E. We could live in our castle in the sky and never have to worry about any responsibilities. Just the two of us, and whatever lies on the moon, peacefully watching over earth." Linhardt smiled warmly.

"How would we even eat?" Byleth asked, humoring his husband's weird ideas.

"That would be easy. We would simply bring food with us and start farming. Although...I am not too fond of that idea. Perhaps we should bring a servant or two with us to do all the work." Said the nerd.

"I don't think they would like living on the moon all that much." Byleth chuckled, accepting his husband's nerdy shenanigans.

"They'll get used to it. Besides, they could always float back."

What a nerd, Byleth thinks, sipping tea. A cute, smart, dumb nerd.

"I don't think mortals would do well on the moon." Byleth countered. "True..." Lin said. "In that case, we should look for the elixir of immortality."

"But it is on the moon, is it not?"

"True again."

Byleth couldn't help but laugh, causing Linhardt to lean back and do the same.

"It is just a suggestion." Linhardt eventually said. Byleth playfully rolled his eyes before kissing the nerd on the cheek. "We should return to our work," Byleth said. Lin groaned. "Do we have to? I was hoping to take a nap right now." He complained. Byleth got up and stood next to Linhardt. "I'll carry you to your desk if I have to." Lin didn't respond. Byleth took this as a yes and lifted his green-haired nerd along with the cats that were on him. Linhardt always forgot how strong Byleth was. Because Linhardt was Linhardt, he closed his eyes and tried to sleep as Byleth carried him inside the castle. No one batted an eye at the sight- it was really common for Byleth to carry a stubborn Linhardt who didn't want to work inside.

"Oh hello Pr- oh!" Bernadetta waved to her former professor before she realized he was carrying a pretending-to-sleep Linhardt. "Hello, Bernadetta. What brings you here?" Her former professor asked. "O-oh, um, I brought you two something! I see Lin's asleep so-" Linhardt's eyes shot awake at the mention of a gift. "Hello, Bernadetta." He said tiredly, still in the arms of Byleth.

"Oh, um, hello Linhardt." Bernadetta said, still not used to the weird sight. She held out a beautifully wrapped box. "I-I know you two enjoy reading so...here!" She said. "Oh, but your hands are full..." "Let us talk in the study." "Okay!"

The trio of nerds made their way to the castle's large study. The two rulers spent most of their time in there, working (although Linhardt always tried to sleep while Byleth wasn't looking). Upon entering, Byleth set Linhardt down on the couch in front of the two desks. Bernadetta handed her former professor the gift and waited anxiously for him to open it. "Wasn't it for both of us?" Linhardt complained. "Aren't you sleeping?" Byleth retorted, causing the sleepy mage boy to groan. "I would be if you didn't force me to work." Byleth just rolled his eyes. Not wanting Bernadetta to sit through their usual pointless back and forth, he carefully opened the beautifully decorated box. Inside was a book full of legends regarding the stars. Bernadetta smiled widely, proud of herself. "Well?"

"Linhardt was just telling me about the moon rabbit legend, we'll be sure to read this together tonight." Byleth nodded. Bernadetta silently congratulated herself for getting the green-haired gay kings a good gift.

"I, um, really enjoyed the book myself so I'm sure you two will as well!" Bernadetta said. "So, um, yeah!" She awkwardly stood still before exiting the room. Setting the box down and taking out the book, he sat next to his pretending-to-sleep-husband. "I wonder if the moon rabbit story is in here..." He pondered out loud. "Should be," Linhardt replied, sitting up. "Let's see," Byleth began, opening the book as his husband leaned against his shoulder. "The Legend of Chang E." Linhardt lazily pointed to the page number. "Shall we read it?" Byleth suggested. "I already did." Lin leaned back on the couch. "Read it to me, will you?" Byleth rolled his eyes fondly. "Yes, your highness." He said in a teasing tone, earning a smug grin from Lin.

"Once upon a time, ten suns were taking the form of crows that took turns circling the earth. The suns were the children of the Jade Emperor but felt very lonely. One day, all ten suns came down and scorched the earth, causing chaos and panic. Their father, the Jade Emperor ordered them to behave. When they didn't, he asked the great archer Lord Houyi to reason with them. When Houyi saw the damage, he was very angry and shot down nine of the ten sons out of desperation, leaving one behind to serve as the only sun. When the Jade Emperor heard this, he got angry and banished Houyi and his wife Chang E to the earth to live as mortals.

Seeing that Chang E was miserable as a mortal, Houyi set out to find a way back to the heavens and immortality. He traveled to the Kunlun Moutain to visit the Queen Mother of the West who gave him an elixir to share with his wife. The vial contained enough for the couple to become immortal but it was the last of its kind, and the Queen warned Houyi that it must be shared between the two, as it was the last elixir for thousands of years. On his way home, Houyi was to repay his respects to the Emperor of the earth, but first he went straight to his wife to give her the vial for safekeeping. Chang E had become so miserable about her mortality that she could not control herself and drank the elixir instead of splitting it between her and Houyi. Once Houyi returned home, he saw Chang E floating towards the sky. Houyi was angry and heartbroken upon seeing the empty vial. Raising his bow, he aimed to shoot her down but could not bring himself to do it.

Chang E Floated up to the moon where she settled. She missed her husband dearly although she had two dear companions with her. One was a jade rabbit that pounded a pestle and mortar to find the elixir of immortality. The other was woodcutter Wu gang who had offended the gods and was banished to the moon. He was only allowed to leave if he managed to cut down a tree that grew on the moon. He spent his time doing this, but each time he cut the tree down, it would grow back, forcing him to live on the moon forever." Byleth finished, slowly closing the book.

"It was a different telling of the legend was it not?" He turned his head to find his husband fast asleep. Smiling warmly, he took off his coat and placed it on Linhardt before setting the book on his desk and returning to rest with him.

**Author's Note:**

> just 10000% pure nerdy indulgence


End file.
